Brad Pitt Starrer Actioner Takes Us Away From Train Rides For Life – DEETS INSIDE

the bullet train

Starring Brad Pitt, Joey King, Aaron Taylor-Johnson, Brian Tyree Henry, Andrew Koji, Hiroyuki Sanada, Michael Shannon, Benito A. Martínez Ocasio and Sandra Bullock.

Directed by David Leitch

Rating: * ½

There are horrible movies. Then there’s The Bullet Train. It makes Junya Satō’s old 1978 Japanese movie Bullet Train look like Dr. Zhivago, doctorate or not. To call this a spoof of time (ours) and space (theirs) would be an insult to an outer space glitch like Ad Astra, which also starred Brad Pit. The movie and Pitt were much smarter in Ad Astra than they were in this movie. The bullet train seems like a pretext for enhanced stupidity and bad acting, except for Andrew Koji (playing a Japanese assassin) and Joey King (playing a dangerously innocent-looking hitwoman) who are excellent.

The mood is more dirty than sparkling. The characters come to a brutal end on the speeding train. I could almost hear canned laughter in the background, as if brutal death were fodder for stand-up comedy.

The train is packed with killers of all genders, nationalities, and colors who add to the enthusiasm of marijuana smokers on a Saturday night. There is nothing more dead than a corpse acting alive. The Bullet Train has two characters on board who are dead on departure. The others behave as if they were drugged with childhood hormones, running around killing and maiming each other on a train that has seen better days.

Based on the Japanese novel Maria Beetle by Kōtarō Isaka, The Bullet Train is about different killers fighting each other on a speeding train. Don’t bother finding out who’s who or why actors like Ryan Reynolds, Channing Tatum (playing a train passenger who flirts with the male cast), and Sandra Bullock agreed to make guest appearances in a movie that would rank as one of the worst of history the collective career of the entire cast.

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Shot by cinematographer Jonathan Sela, who also shot director David Leitch’s previous feature Atomic Blonde (which was also one of my least favorite movies of late), The Bullet Train has a blotchy, oversaturated look, as if the frames were trying to compete. with a carnival in the city where acrobats could jump higher than the actors in this movie.

If I had to choose between watching The Bullet Train again and getting run over, I’d choose the latter. This makes our Burning Train an instant classic.

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